Today, like every other work day, I woke up with a horrible feeling. The feeling that says "you just cannot go into that place today." I dragged myself to work despite being really upset that I just did not want to go (like every other work day). I started my day with three crabby bosses emailing my blackberry non-stop while I was in a 4-hour meeting. I had to leave the meeting because they needed so much *right away*. Fast forward to one minor breakdown (at least I have an office door to close) and a trip downtown for class where I'm taking a Negotiations class. On tonight's negotiation, I do the worst in the entire class. Yay.
Then I realize. I'm acting like a miserable jerk. My employees know I'm miserable, my bosses know I'm miserable. Getting towards the end of 2 1/2 years in school has made me very run down. I'm constantly exhausted, never getting enough sleep or time for the things I want to do. That, in addition to the situation at work, is making me a miserable jerk. No one wants to be around a miserable jerk. AND IT IS NOT PART OF MY NEW 2008 PLAN! :)
I WILL knock it off.
My employees don't deserve to be around an unhappy person (I sure don't like being around my bosses when they are unhappy). My friends and family don't deserve to be around an unhappy person. And, I don't deserve to be an unhappy person. Everything just piles up and sometimes I cannot handle it. But I will realize that school is almost over. (Though I really like it, it is just exhausting.) I will realize that my work situation is not that bad. I will realize that (queue Alicia Keys) EVERYTHINGS GONNA BE ALRIGHT. No more miserable jerk (or at least not too often).
